!2 thank you notes of Christmas.

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  • !2 thank you notes of Christmas.

    Dec 25
    My dearest darling Edward,
    What a wonderful surprise has just greeted me! That sweet partridge, in that lovely little pear-tree; what an enchanting, romantic, poetic present! Bless you, and thank you.
    Your deeply loving,
    Emily

    Dec. 26
    Beloved Edward,
    The two turtle-doves arrived this morning, and are cooing away in the pear-tree as I write. I'm so touched and grateful!
    With undying love, as always,
    Emily

    Dec. 27
    My darling Edward,
    You do think of the most original presents! Who ever thought of sending anybody three French hens? Do they really come all the way from France? It's a pity we have no chicken coops, but I expect we'll find some. Anyway, thank-you so much; they're lovely.
    Your devoted,
    Emily

    Dec. 28
    Dearest Edward,
    What a surprise! Four calling birds arrived this morning. They are very sweet, even if they do call rather loudly - they make telephoning almost impossible - but I expect they'll calm down when they get used to their new home. Anyway, I'm very grateful, of course I am.
    Love from Emily

    Dec. 29
    Dearest Edward,
    The mailman has just delivered five most beautiful gold rings, one for each finger, and all fitting perfectly! A really lovely present! Lovelier, in a way, than birds, which do take rather a lot of looking after. The four that arrived yesterday are still making a terrible row, and I'm afraid none of us got much sleep last night. Mother says she wants to use the rings to "wring" their necks. Mother has such a sense of humour. This time she's only joking, I think, but I do know what she means. Still, I love the rings.
    Bless you,
    Emily

    Dec. 30
    Dear Edward,
    Whatever I expected to find when I opened the front door this morning, it certainly wasn't six socking great geese laying eggs all over the porch. Frankly, I rather hoped that you had stopped sending me birds. We have no room for them, and they've already ruined the croquet lawn. I know you meant well, but let's call a halt, shall we?
    Love,
    Emily

    Dec. 31
    Edward,
    I thought I said NO MORE BIRDS. This morning I woke up to find no more than seven swans, all trying to get into our tiny goldfish pond. I'd rather not think what's happened to the goldfish. The whole house seems to be full of birds, to say nothing of what they leave behind them, so please, please, stop!
    Your Emily

    Jan 1
    Frankly, I prefer the birds. What am I to do with eight milkmaids? And their cows! Is this some kind of a joke? If so, I'm afraid I don't find it very amusing.
    Emily

    Jan. 2
    Look here, Edward,
    This has gone far enough. You say you're sending me nine ladies dancing. All I can say is, judging from the way they dance, they're certainly not ladies. The village just isn't accustomed to seeing a regiment of shameless viragos, with nothing on but their lipstick, cavorting round the green, and it's mother and I who get the blame. If you value our friendship, which I do (less and less), kindly stop this ridiculous behaviour at once!
    Emily

    Jan 3
    As I write this letter, 10 disgusting old men are prancing up and down all over what used to be the garden, before the geese and the swans and the cows got at it. And several of them, I have just noticed, are being a nuisance with the milkmaids. Meanwhile the neighbours are trying to have us evicted. I shall never speak to you again.
    Emily

    Jan 4
    This is the last straw! You know I detest bagpipes! The place has now become something between a menagerie and a madhouse, and a man from the council has just declared it unfit for habitation. At least Mother has been spared this last outrage; they took her away yesterday afternoon in an ambulance to a home for the bewildered. I hope you're satisfied.

    Jan 5
    Sir,
    Our client, Miss Emily Wilbraham, instructs me to inform you that with the arrival on her premises at 7:30 this morning of the entire percussion section of the Boston Symphony Orchestra, and several of their friends, she has no course left open to her but to seek an injunction to prevent you importuning her further. I am making arrangements for the return of much assorted livestock.
    I am, Sir, yours faithfully,
    G. Creep
    Attorney at law


    Wondering what the CB stands for? check this out!
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwGihE02s18 All pictures taken by me, all within half a mile or less of my house! Enjoy!

  • #2
    Love it!
    I SWEAR I plugged those things in before I put them up. They were working......THEN.

    Comment


    • #3
      LOL What an insightful story!
      People really act weird at Christmas time. After all, what other time of year do you sit in front of a dead tree in the living room and eat nuts and sweets out of your socks?

      Comment


      • #4
        That's great CB. How entertaining and funny. Thanks for the chuckles.

        Comment


        • #5
          i think i am going to steal this. really good chuckles.

          Comment


          • #6
            Way to funny CB TY!
            Now if I could just get one more... right there... what the...

            Comment


            • #7
              that is awesome.....

              (starts thinking hmmm who do I want to drive away.. great idea!!!!!(atleast the livestock part.)
              Visit my Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/WalterHeussmannPhotography

              if you like what you see give me a like!!

              Comment

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